By Dave Stefani
Can someone please explain American Apparel to me … What!? Really? No … Really!? I mean … they’re cotton T-shirts, right? I didn’t miss something here? Why are they $20.00? What is this, the Pentagon? Do they sell $600.00 hammers, too? Man, those must be some really nice sheep.
Okay, I’m at the Buffalo Exchange the other day. And I pick out four plain T-shirts of a good color and fit, one of which happens to be an American Apparel shirt. So I get to the counter and the American Apparel shirt happens to be half off. The girl at the register acted like I’d just won a fucking Humvee in Vegas. “This is half off. A great price, especially for American Apparel,” she beamed.
And I say, “Listen honey. American Apparel … Hanes … I don’t really give a shit. If by great price you mean that used and half off it costs what it should new, then yeah … great price. Now give me my fucking ‘no bag’ token so I can help fight feline leukemia.”
I don’t understand how plain T-shirts became so hip, but the marketers of this stuff must be some kind of geniuses, not to mention having balls of Kevlar. The only thing stupider than paying $20.00 for a T-shirt that has some name brand printed across it is paying $20.00 dollars for a T-shirt that doesn’t have a name brand printed across it.
Read more about what Dave doesn’t like:
photo: beckipeckham
26 Comments
Okay, I have to keep it real here. I’m a fan of American Apparel.
It’s all about the fit, baby. Most T-shirts are too short and too wide. After a couple washes, those Standard American shirts fit me like a Greek condom: pretty damn well.
I’m going to have to agree with Charley on this one. I put on other shirts and I either feel like the shirt is trying to make fun of my body, or the shirt already has made fun of my body and now its going to get all baggy and lazy about it.
But I REALLY HATE UGGS! See.. I can hate still!
Plus they are made in America just like me. And Bruce Springsteen.
Oh yeah the girls that work there are almost always hot as microwaved tortillas. And they are always wearing like.. the leotards and stuff.
I just reread the feline leukemia part!!!!
Hey, that beckipeckham seems like she’s got some chops.
Charley and Robert are correct. It’s about the fit. And the fabric- they’re oh-so-soft and comfy because it’s high quality combed cotton. Not to mention how the shirts are made: all in downtown LA by garment workers who are given a fair wage and excellent benefits. But then again, maybe I’m biased because I work for the company.
Other retailers like the Gap and J.Crew sell plain t-shirts with nothing printed on them for about the same amount or more.
Btw, Buffalo Exchange is one of my fav places to find things..
I buy the $15 dollar shirts from there. Those ones are the best.
And, when I divide the price I paid by the number of times I wear the shirt, I’ve got an amazing bargain!
You’re all brainwashed idiots (But I still love you, except Lisa who I don’t know, but who probably deserves love as well despite her use of the word fav). I still see no reason why an American company who gives employees “a fair wage and excellent benefits” can’t sell a t-shirt for $10.00 or less. And as far as everyone yammering about the fit and comfort, I’m not buying it. It’s a goddamn cotton t-shirt. How much more comfortable is it than any other cotton t-shirt? Of the four t-shirts that I picked up at Buffalo Exchange, the American Apparel shirt fits the worst. That’s not to say that it fits bad, but it definately doesn’t fit as good as the other shirts I bought. Maybee American Apparel shirts only fit good on their usual wearers: Skinny, hairless chested, androgynous man-boys. But me, I’ve got pectoral muscles and a shoulder structure wider than a fourteenth century castle waif, and for my money Gap t-shirts fit the best (It’s at this point that Charley chimes in with his bullshit short and wide arguement).
Skinny, hairless chested, androgynous man-boys.
Dave: 1
Us: 0
I thank you, Dave, for kindly overlooking that offense and for offering your unconditional love to strangers.
Sure, we could sell ‘em for 10 bucks (and we do sell them for less than the retail price to our wholesale customers, who make up the bulk of our business) but in the world of retail, there is a magic formula used to come up with product pricing. There’s a lot of factors that come into play – the cost of retailing is high – setting up a store is a time-consuming, expensive investment, employees, rent, etc.. And you should sleep well at night knowing that your buck spent with AA is a well-spent one, going towards giving our garments workers a good wage as opposed to some expensive marketing campaign and professional models (we do neither).
And hey, we’re trying to make a buck, too.
It sounds like you’re not a typical stick-skinny Silverlake hipster (I might be wrong of the last 2 descriptions), you might want to try the 50/50 or our new Tri-Blend track t-shirt. Since they’re a blend of cotton and other stuff, they’ve got a bit more give and I’m known to not take off the Tri-Blend for days on end..
I’m in love with Lisa.
Who isn’t?
What do you do at American Apparel, Lisa?
Pip (I mean Robert), I agree. In these days of impending nuclear holocaust, there is nothing more fetching than a woman willing to wear the same t-shirt for days on end. Cause I mean, all your other shit could be burnt up right? Are these American Apparel T’s nuke proof? That might justify their higher prices. And I’ll have you know that my buck was not well-spent at AA. I’m still a complete drunk and all I got was this crummy t-shirt. You say there is a “magical formula” used for pricing and that a lot of “factors” come into play. By factors in this magical formula do you mean elves and dragons and such, or are we just talking about the run-of-the-mill white witchery? So you don’t use professional models heh? I may see a new career opportunity opeining up. How do you feel about shoulder hair?
I’m on my 5th day with this pair of jeans. I wish I was drunk 5 days in a row.
crap I mean Robert
Dear Charley,
I work in the giant pink factory in Downtown LA. They won’t let me sew so I work in their web department.
Kind regards,
Lisa
Yeah, that’s capitalism for you. You take a product, grease it up with advertising, and slide it into the consumer’s shopping bag for ten times what it costs to make.
For what it’s worth, I work at Dirty Microbe, and we’ll sell you one for $15 with funny stuff on it.
Like tuna casserole?
Christian, but are your Dirty Microbe t-shirts printed on American Apparel T’s, or those Hanes ones that fit Dave better?
If your shirts are printed on Hanes or another brand no one thought to “grease” with advertising, what’s your markup?
BTW, Busted Tees
are funnier.
Ehhh …
I’m not sure Busted Tees are funnier. It’s close.
Although, “You have died of dysentery” is pretty good. Maybe that’s just nostalgia talking.
They’re more expensive, too.
And Mike, Dirty Microbe accepts submissions. Only you can make them funnier than Busted.
Yep, all our shirts are American Apparel. We could reduce our blank-shirt cost by 50% by switching to Hanes, but for $15 a shirt should be quality. American Apparel tees fit better, last longer, and are soaked in awesomesauce at the factory.
Mike Bijon: Just being compared to BustedTees is totally awesome! Those guys are funny. Our company is just four months old and we only do about 1/30th of the business BT does right now, but we’ll catch up.
Charley Daniels: Totally! Submissions ar where it’s at. We love submissions like a D&D kid loves Mountain Dew and Funions.
I think a shirt with a screenprinted pair of tits on it would be great. By beer #5, I’ll have another suggestion.
Speaking of T-Shirts, I like the new sponsor. I wanted to order that nintendo special character mystery coin block thing, but they are sold out. Ummm… maybe because they are AWESOME and only 4 dollars?!
Christian, I love it!
American Apparel tees fit better, last longer, and are soaked in awesomesauce at the factory.
I think I’ll take a stroll by the vat of Awsomesauce for a whiff – I hear we’ve got a fresh batch.
I refuse to ever buy any article of clothing from this store, no matter how comfortable and durable people claim for them to be. It really just is too much for a plain piece of fabric. But I must admit the majority of my animosity for this ridiculous company comes from the ads. Absolutely ridiculous. And don’t try to justify it by saying Prada, Calvin Klein, etc also have racy ads because atleast their models are attractive and are naked in classy ways.
Brian, I disagree.
Prada and Calvin Klein have also had racy ads.
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[...] Boy, there’s some lively discussion going on in Dave’s American Apparel post. I only point this out because it’s essentially the liveliest discussion we’ve had since Sin Pies began, 150 posts ago. And, yes, 17 comments is a lot for one post on this site. We’re indie, man, INDIE! Come join the chit chat. Especially if you have an opinion about American Apparel T-shirts. Did I mention it’s completely lively? [...]
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